Chapter 76: Grandma's Boy

In October came the day I had been dreading for years. My mom gave me the news my grandma was not expected to live past the weekend. My grandmother's lungs were failing. She would soon need to go on a breathing machine to stay alive, but the chances were she would never regain consciousness. She chose to forego the breathing machine long enough to have a chance to say goodbye.

My mother, sister, infant niece and I would drive out to the City of Hope to say goodbye to my grandma. I begged and pleaded for Sara to go with me. I needed her for emotional support. She told me she was unable to take off work that day.

I have an extreme fear of hospitals and real medical places.

It is kind of interesting from a psychological standpoint considering my medical fetish.

I have a habit of fainting while visiting friends and family in the hospital. I just cannot help it.

I was absolutely terrified I would faint when I went to see my grandma. Sara had a secret supply of anti-anxiety medications she saved for "performance emergencies".

I begged her to at least give me one of those pills so I could better cope with the experience of going to say goodbye to my grandma. Sara told me she only had a few left, and she needed to save them for a concert she was attending in the future.

I felt completely abandoned by Sara in the moment I needed her most. I was a nervous wreck in the car. My family and I were getting on the freeway, and this small beat-up Honda pulls in front of our car. The license plate says Jesus and the frame around the plate says Trust in God; I will protect you.

I believe in God and try to be a good person, but I am not super religious. I have not been to church in decades. My grandma was always a very religious person. She was always volunteering at her church and attending regular sermons.

I took it as a sign, and I felt a sense of calmness from reading the license plate. You can call me crazy, but I did not faint at the hospital that day.

If you have been reading this entire story, I am sure by now you have figured out I am crazy. Between my obsession with success and my dealing with Sara's infidelity. I must be crazy.

I have always had this feeling inside that I am special. Although everyone doubts me and I have no visual talent, I am secretly meant for great things.

I have a destiny. Some people might attribute this to the delusions of grandeur that go along with my potential manic depression.

While visiting my grandma for the last time, my grandma welcomed each of my family members to her bed side and told us something personal.

Mom did not share the details of their last conversations, but I know my grandma asked my mom to take care of my grandpa. She told my sister who had only given birth 6 months before that she would be a fine mother.

My grandma whispered in my ear,

"You are special, you always have been, and you always will be!"

I'd love to think God told her to tell me that.

My aunt and uncle were part of some religious group the rest of us called a cult. According to the FBI and Netflix in 2024 it is a cult. They were absolutely convinced the leader of their group had performed a special ritual that was going to save my grandma.

I can remember them acting like none of us should be sad and this won't be the last time we speak to my grandma.

My grandma passed away a few days later peacefully. I was not told till the next morning but the night it happened I felt like her spirit came and visited me one last time to say goodbye. When my mother told me in the morning, I already knew.

A few weeks later Sara went with me to the funeral.

On the way there we got stuck at a train crossing for the world's longest train. We were already running a little late and I was feeling emotional from the events of the day. I couldn't help myself and I started to cry.

Sara out of nowhere just pulls this "Fast and the Furious" style Toyko drift from a stand still. Imagine doing a U turn out of a narrow parallel park with one move without hitting a single car. She does a U turn and drives as fast as possible finding a route around the train. We made it to the church on time.

It must have been difficult for Sara to come to the funeral because she had her feud with my mom and sister. They all hated each other. Sara hugged my mom and sister, and the feud seemed to end.

Sara was never going to be my family's favorite person but there was a new peace and weight lifted off my shoulders.

My grandma owned a very nice house in the Torrance Hills near Palos Verdes. It had a beautiful view of Los Angeles from the South Bay Ocean to DTLA to Orange County. I grew up coming to that house monthly if not weekly. I never really appreciated that view until it was time to say goodbye.

As part of my grandmother's will, the house was sold and the money was split between my mother, my uncle, my aunt, and my grandfather. Some of the money was used to pay off the medical bills from my grandmother's fight with cancer. In the end my mom got about $250,000.

My uncle gave majority of his money to the cult. They have their own YouTube channel studio with state-of-the-art camera equipment and lighting now.

Chapter 76: Bash to the Future